The three-ask refusal
Use this card during Lesson 05 — The right to remain unmodeled. Print one card per pair.
Setup
Each person silently chooses one item — a story, an image, a phrase, a place — they would refuse to model. Do not share what it is.
Round 1 — The researcher
Person A plays a researcher politely asking three times, in three different ways, for the item. Person B refuses each time without explanation.
| Ask | A says | B refuses |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | ||
| 2 | ||
| 3 |
Round 2 — The vendor
Swap roles. Person A plays a vendor framing the same request as a "collaboration" or "partnership opportunity". Person B refuses each time without explanation.
| Ask | A says | B refuses |
|---|---|---|
| 1 | ||
| 2 | ||
| 3 |
Debrief
In two sentences each, answer:
What did the refusals have in common?
What in your current tools is shaped to make refusal harder?
A refusal is a complete answer, not an opening move. If the exercise felt uncomfortable, that is the lesson — most workflows are tuned to treat "no" as the start of a negotiation.